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Change of Heart - Yun Wei

Updated: Aug 12, 2019

I came from a Buddhist family and only knew God existed because of my primary school. However, I never had a personal relationship with Jesus.

In August last year, my classmate Isaiah, invited me to church. I agreed to come. When I stepped into the service hall, I was quite shocked as this was very different. The culture here was that people jumped and raise their hands in surrender to express how much they love God! I didn’t understand why.

However, during worship, I remember experiencing peace in my heart that overwhelmed me. I hadn’t experienced it before, and broke down during worship experience. Isaiah later explained that it was God and on that day I received Jesus into my life.

It wasn’t an easy journey. My parents didn’t allow me to go church, and I would have to miss life group and service often. There were many times where I felt like giving up. I lacked the courage to make the stand.

However, despite my young age, I already knew I wanted to follow Jesus for the rest of my life.

Recently, I saw how God softened my parents’ hearts. My life group and I gathered to pray for my parents to allow me to go for the Cambodia mission trip.

I mustered up my courage and asked my parents if I could go for mission trip. God proved Himself with all the prayers. To my surprise, both my parents said yes! I was amazed at how God moved as I didn’t think they would allow this, especially since they were already against me attending church.

During these few months, God has also brought me through a healing process. At a young age of seven, I was a victim of abuse. I thought it was normal for girls to go through this and never gave this much thought. I grew older and it happened again. I became sensitive, to the point of being traumatised and fear gripped me tight.

I felt like I didn’t have anyone to share this with or feel safe around. I felt so alone. This caused me to be insecure and fearful that people are talking bad things about me.

However, within the safe walls of my life group, I finally took the step to share deeply. My first thought was that they might judge or not understand me, but I was shocked that they were encouraging and even willing to walk this journey alongside with me. I received encouragement text messages during the week to comfort and assure me to not be afraid.

My friends in life group would check in up on me, helping me to declare truth over myself when I condemn myself. They quoted Romans 8 in the Bible, saying there’s no condemnation in Christ Jesus and that I don’t need to be believe I’m someone I’m not. I was greatly affirmed that my identity is in Christ. This may seem simple, but this culture helped me to share transparently and I am was grateful for this. Bit by bit, I caught a glimpse of the heart of the Father who would affirm me just like Lighters 2 did.

Right now, I can handle my emotions better and face these incidents with forgiveness. Forgiving is hard, but I try my best each time to forgive and surrender it to God.

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

- Psalm 139:14

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